engagement pictures sneak peak edition

Kevin and I took a few engagement pictures last night at our family reunion in Heber. Enjoy a preview!

Okay, so these were some of the bloopers. ;) Real ones are to come though, don't fret!

some (long winded) thoughts on being engaged

Today I was sitting in my Family Processes class and a classmate sat next to me and started up a conversation. Now, if any of you know my mom, you would know that this is something that she would do on a regular basis, but I tend to try to keep to myself in certain situations, class being one of them. I rarely talk to people in my classes. Unless I am forced to. And then I do it resentfully.

But this girl was really nice, and we got to chatting a little bit throughout the class. I mentioned the words "my fiance", because I legitimately insert those words into as many conversations as I possibly can (I just love having it be known that I am engaged, I'm not sure why), so of course we started talking about how I'm getting married and stuff. I knew that she was married and then found out that she got married last year on December 21, just one day before our day. Of course she had all kinds of advice, a lot of which I just nodded and smiled and thought to myself (I'll make my own decision, thank you), and then she asked us how long we had been engaged. I told her that we got engaged on July 21, which was just over two months ago and her face kind of became shocked. She told me that she and her husband had gotten engaged at this time last September and had less than a three month engagement. I said, "I know right? I've already been engaged two months and have as long as your engagement to go. It totally stinks." She was quick to jump in and say, "No matter what you do, don't mess up, because it's so worth it." and then moved the conversation to other things.

Okay. If you aren't in the mood to hear a rant, stop reading, because I am about to get all up on my soapbox. I'm not mad or irritated at what this girl said, I just wish that I could have had the opportunity to clarify what I meant when I said that that being engaged was hard. Because at that phrase, "engagement is hard," people seem to automatically jump to the conclusion that it's the law of chastity aspect that makes it hard. I'll be completely honest with you. Kevin and I are doing great in that regard. Yes, we are very excited for the day when we will be able to express our feelings for each other in the appropriate way between husband and wife, but we have our rules and we (almost always) stick to those rules, we have a curfew, I have never at any time felt that I was in danger of becoming unworthy to enter the temple of God because of our behavior. When then temple is your goal, it becomes a powerful talisman against that temptation. Oh trust me, the temptation is there, but in my experience at least, it is overridden every time by something so much more important, beautiful, sacred and precious.

No. When I say that being engaged is hard, or that it stinks or that I can't wait for it to end is for other reasons (although the whole marital intimacy thing is something I am excited for). These reasons are as follows:

I cannot wait to stop living with 5 other girls. My roommates are all so nice, so sweet, and I feel very blessed that I am living in such a great place before I get married. But honestly, living with other people when you are engaged absolutely SUCKS. I want privacy, I want alone time with Kevin, I want to sleep in a room where I get to help dictate the rules, I want to have a refrigerator that is only filled with the food that I buy and that I want there, I want a place where I can cook a decent meal for my sweetheart without competing for stove space, I want the mass of pots and pans to end, I want a bathroom that is not the most awkward thing ever in existence, I want to be able to walk around naked without having the fear that someone (that I don't want to see me) will walk in on me, when my roommate is doing something in the middle of the night that is making it impossible for me to sleep, I want to be able to reach over and smack him (lovingly) instead of making concessions. The list of reasons why I want to stop living with 5 other girls could go on and on. I am so unbelievably tired of it.

The next reason is closely linked with the first one. I'm tired of sharing space with 6 boys in Kevin's apartment. We spend the majority of our free time there and it becomes slightly wearing. Boys are more smelly and less likely to clean their pots and much more likely to make racist, sexist or inappropriate jokes, even when I am sitting right there. It definitely bothers Kevin as well when his roommate makes a comment about freezing his balls off while I am in the room.

And the biggest reason that I am so flipping tired of being engaged is every single night at 9:00 when Kevin says, "okay I should probably take you home now." And I slowly gather all of my stuff, and I stall, and I drag my feet, and I kiss him a few times to hopefully distract him from making me go home, and we slowly walk across the parking lot, and we wade through the swarm of people surrounding my doorstep (that's what it feels like some nights), and we have a very public goodnight kiss, where who even knows who is watching, and then Kevin says goodbye. And I keep pulling him back for another kiss, or to tell him something that I absolutely had to say right then (which is usually something stupid like, I ate a grapefruit today), and I tell him that I love him many times in as many forms as I can think of, and all the while I know why I'm being such a weirdo and it's because that goodbye moment at the end of every day breaks my heart a little bit. I actually cry about it very frequently. That may sound completely stupid, but honestly, I miss him desperately in that eight hours til morning when I am going to see him again. It gets harder and harder every night and every single time he takes me home I think, "there is no possible way that I can continue to do this for three more months." I literally hate it.

So, for the girl who told me to make sure not to mess up, and for all of those who think, "a five month engagement?? Who do they think they are kidding? There's no way they will be able to stay morally clean!" I say to you, we'll be fine. The real struggle lies in the separation that we have to experience every single day, that I cannot wait to eliminate.

Three months and twenty five days. 

And now, enjoy an adorable couple of my love and I.

Dang we are so cute.

the moral of the story is, we've been eating REALLY well this weekend

Yesterday was our 2 month anniversary of getting engaged!!!! Yay two months down!!

Kevin asked me out on a date to go to the temple and to Olive Garden. I love so much that he still takes initiative to ask me on dates even though we've been engaged for two months. I love him so much, it's insane.

Oh what a celebration it was. 

Thank you to my work for supplying the gift card so we could have a little splurge. :)

 What a feast.

 The awkward iphone picture in a restaurant when I don't have makeup because we just came from the temple.

Today has been a BIG homework day for both of us (I wrote a 5 page paper and laid the groundwork for another paper, both due this week, and Kevin just has nonstop EVERYTHING all the time), so we started out with a breakfast of champions. Scrambled eggs and waffles made from cinnamon rolls. I'm serious. Found it on Pinterest. It was pretty good too, besides the fact that all the good oils and sugars got left behind on the grill so the waffles were a bit on the dry side. I might have had four, don't worry about it.

All in all, it's been a great weekend. We had an insanely busy week so the past 30 hours have been wonderful in comparison.

And more and more every day, I find myself overwhelmed with gratitude for the wonderful man I've chosen to marry. 

Speaking of which, in exactly three months from this very minute, we will be standing in a receiving line, after being sealed in the temple for time and all eternity! 

We can last three more months right? ;)

school. all the cool kids do it.

We are officially not even a month into school down here in cougar town, and it is kicking our butts.
There have been quite a few tears of frustration shed in the last couple of days.
Kevin and I are learning how to balance our time between school, work and each other.
We wish we could just ditch out on everything else and be together all the time.
But we can't, so we have to learn to be okay will sitting side by side doing homework and reading textbooks.
Kevin has it way worse than I do. His classes are insane. I get stressed out over basic principles of statistics. He gets stressed out over organic chemistry and multi-variable calculus. I am such a bum.
I told Kevin tonight (after learning about ovulation and menstruation in my women's health class) that he can do all of this hard school stuff so I don't have to, and then I'll grow humans inside of me and birth them so that he doesn't have to. We decided that that was a fair compromise.
This approaching weekend is being looked at with intense relief and more anticipation than probably any weekend so far into the semester.
We need a break.

on top of the world (or just Utah)

We had such a great weekend, spending lots of time with family!

We went up to Logan to watch my brother and aunt run the top of Utah marathon!

 What a stud!

 We enjoyed spending time together as we waited for the runners.

 Even when it was freezing and windy. Thank you, Kevin for being my wind breaker.

 We are a tad bit narcissistic, and we love each other and ourselves.

 We had a regional conference today with Elder Dallin H. Oaks presiding! What a great meeting. 

 Then it was time for the birthday dinner at grandma's! Kevin was slightly enamored with their beautiful plates.

 My aunt Terri brought stuff to make jewelry and we had a grand old time stringing beads.

 All I could really manage was a pair of earrings.

 And Kevin made me a Halloween bracelet. 

Thank you Grandma and Grandpa for the birthday card. ;)

I love spending time with my family and the fact that Kevin fits right in just puts icing on the cake. I have the best possible situation in terms of Kevin joining our family, and I am so excited to join his. I am so lucky and so blessed!

because i watched a highly disturbing documentary

Once upon a time I dropped my Family Finance class. And signed up for a class called Women's Health Issues.
I missed the first two lectures. It's a once a week class.
I went tonight for the first time.
We talked about body image.
Now all I want to do is hug all of the women I know and tell them how beautiful they are and that what they see in the media and advertisements should in no way define how they feel about themselves.
And I've decided that even though I've put on a few pounds in the last year (thank you Gloria's Little Italy and all of your garlic bread), that I still love myself and feel beautiful in my own skin.

The good news is that my fiance loves me.
And God loves me.
I don't have to be a size 23 waist with boobs that fill out a D cup to have self worth.

Next week is female anatomy and mensuration.
The week after that is birth control.
Dang I'm so excited about this class.

warning. this blog post has an inordinate amount of pictures.

Kevin got an iphone a couple of weeks ago which has become our camera. I took the time today to email myself all of these pictures from his phone to put them on my blog.

 

//We went on a roadtrip to Boise//Spent some time with Kevin's family//Ate an enormous smoothie//Beautiful Utah scenery//Kevin took that amazing picture of campus as the sun came up//I fall asleep on the Siesta Sac all the time//We found a place to take engagement pictures//Look who's learning to crochet//Hiking up Slate Canyon. We didn't get far...//Pictures of my birthday, chocolate cake, BYU hoodie and The Sound of Music//BYU football game!!//A few fun pics of us together. Up in park city, pizza date night and my first BYU game//

The last picture I took while I was working on this blog post. Poor tired Kevin. He has been working so hard, I hate to wake him up, but it is past time for dinner.

special

Today was just a regular Wednesday. I woke up super early, went to work, went to class, went to the gym, went to class again, stressed out about homework and hung out.

And I also turned 21.
And my fiance made me a special breakfast.
And my co workers brought me cupcakes.
And let me choose the music that we listened to at work (showtunes).
And I get a Tucanos gift card (oh snap!).
And my sweetheart wrote me a birthday letter.
And we had Cafe Rio for dinner.
And then my sweet Kevin surprised me with homemade crock pot chocolate cake
And a BYU hoodie (which is all that I really wanted).
And the Sound of Music on DVD.

Kevin made it very clear that he wanted me to feel so special today. And I tried to communicate to him that not only did he make me feel special today on my birthday, but he makes me feel special every day. I know that I'm special to him, so I always feel special.

Dang I am a lucky girl.

it's just so great.

Today.
First day after a long weekend. Should be crappy? False. It was awesome.
Work 7-10:30.
I ate oatmeal with bananas and a huge thing of chips and salsa for breakfast.
I got to go to the first devo of the semester and sit with my fiance. Dang it, I love him more and more every day.
We had a twenty minute break to lay on the grass before class.
My classes are so interesting. Family processes today was fantastic.
D&C with Ash Bash.
And then we hit the gym like nobody's business.
We rode the bike.
And stretched.
And did wall sits.
And did squats.
And leg presses.
And hip extensions.
So great. I love working out with Ash.
Now I get to chill, do homework, cross things off of my to do list until it's time to make dinner.
Also, I've discovered how wonderful it feels to be able to serve and provide for the one that you love. I love that when Kevin comes home from a REALLY long day of school today, it will be to a hot meal (of hamburger helper sure, but I'm trying really hard) and a hug and a kiss.
I feel so content and happy with my life right now which fascinates me because I was fully anticipating for everything to be hard and awful once school started.
Don't get me wrong, it's hard. But it's also awesome and happy and such a good experience.
The best word I can use to describe how I feel is grateful. Which I know I just did a whole post about how grateful I feel about everything but it just won't go away.
What a great feeling.
I think I'll keep it. :)

Also, Kevin, I think I'll keep him too. Probably for eternity.
Dang I love that boy.

spilling over

Today I have been feeling so grateful for so many things.
Obviously my wonderful fiance makes the top of the list of everything I'm thankful for. Kevin is amazing. He is so perfect for me. He is so sweet and loving and accepting. He serves me in little ways and makes me feel like a million bucks. He works SO hard in school and at work so that he will be able to provide the type of lifestyle that we want to enjoy someday. He is precious with kids and wins over everyone he meets. I love him so much, and I thank Heavenly Father for him every single day.

I love this gospel and I'm so thankful for the role that it plays in my life. I'm grateful that I was born in the covenant and am sealed to my parents. I am especially grateful that Kevin and I have the opportunity to be sealed for time and all eternity in the temple. We are both so incredibly excited for that day.

My family is so awesome. Today we got to spend SO much time with family. We skyped with Kevin's family right after church and I'm just so excited for the day when they will be my in-laws. They are such great people. I got to spend a lot of time with Kevin's parents last weekend and it was so fun. I feel so lucky that I am marrying into such a wonderful family. Then we got to have dessert at grandma's house. The last time we were there, my brother didn't want any dessert because he is training for a marathon. This time, grandma brought out so many different varieties of fruit with a delicious fruit dip so that Jeffrey could eat dessert with us. She is the epitome of a selfless, giving person. She always is thinking of others and is such an amazing example to me. I love her as well as my grandpa. After dessert we got to spend time with a bunch of my mom's side of the family for dinner. I love our crazy, fun, wild get togethers. There are so many kids running around (which gives Kevin plenty of opportunities to melt my little heart as he wraps those kids around his finger), such good food, fun conversation and lots of love to spread around. I have been truly blessed with the family that I was born into and I hope that I can give my future family some of the same experiences as the ones I have been blessed with.

Today was just such a great day, so filled with love and happiness. I feel very content and happy with my life. :)