it's fine.

We are over half way through the semester.
We are getting married in less than 2 months.
Tomorrow is Halloween.
After that we only have one major holiday to get through before our wedding.
I am experiencing some major mid-semester blues.
Homework and studying are a constant battle.
Waking up in the morning is dreadful.
After going through a summer where I always made it work on time, 7:00 on the dot and usually early, I am consistently late. Last week I went 40 minutes late on Tuesday and an hour late on Wednesday. I did have a legitimate excuse, but still.
At the beginning of the semester, we were super great about eating good meals for dinner every night.
Now we are lucky if we have one good meal a week. Last night Kevin and I had a bowl of cereal at 9:00 at night.

I have to admit, sometimes I have a really hard time enjoying the moment of life that I'm in. As of right now I am always fighting against feelings such as:
"In 8 more loads of laundry, I won't have to kiss Kevin goodbye anymore, I can just kiss him goodnight."
"After I've had 2 more periods, Kevin and I will be married."
"In 6 more FHE's, I'll never have to go to a singles ward FHE again."
"In 6 1/2 weeks I move out and never have to live with random strangers again."

And I keep up a running mantra of "it'll be better once we're married," "I can live with silly roommate issues for a little while longer," "This is going to end soon," "Our wedding will be here before I know it."
I know that this is a problem. I know that we are supposed to "find joy in the journey." I know that it is always better to find happiness in the moment and love where we are at and not wish away our present. But honestly, this present is a little on the crappy side, and I'm glad that I have something to look forward to and that I have an understanding that things won't be this way for much longer.

Yes. There are awesome things about the stage of life that I'm in that I'm going to miss when Kevin and I get married. And things that I am going to realize that I took for granted and wish I had enjoyed more when I had the chance. And I really am trying to enjoy where we are at right now, because I know that I will never be engaged again. I do love it. I swear I do. But on days like today, and in weeks like this week and honestly in months like this past month, I welcome the change that is coming up when this semester is over. I'm ready to bid goodbye to single life and I will probably be more happy than sad to see it go.

But until then, I will do what I can to be happy now and try not to be too anxious for December 22.

attention, we have a winner

Reason I love Kevin number 485.

Even when he is crazy busy studying for his Ochem midterm, he lets me sit on his lap and cry in an empty classroom when I am feeling sick. And he makes me feel like there is nothing better he could be doing in his whole entire life than holding and making me feel better. Even though he is crazy busy and has a freaking hard midterm to take that day.

For the record, the number 485 was just random. I don't actually have a list of reasons why I love Kevin. But if I did, you can bet there would be more than 485 points on it.

brace yourselves. i had a lot to say.

Today has been a sick day.
I went to the doctor yesterday and had a procedure done that has left me feeling really achy and crampy.
I made it through 3 1/2 hours of work today, but after taking two doses of two different painkillers in 3 hours with no relief, I decided to go home. I've been laying around with my warm rice bag watching 17 Again and wishing I could be cuddling with my handsome fiance.

Speaking of him, the rest of this post is going to be dedicated to bragging about what an amazing man I am marrying (in 58 days but who's counting?).

Kevin takes such good care of me. Today when I was being incredibly whiny and texting him at work about how miserable I was he said, "Oh honey I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?" (he's also incredibly sweet, obviously). Of course I responded that he should buy me lots of chocolate to which he said "Done. :)" Last night when I came home late from spending the afternoon at the doctor and at my parent's house, he rubbed my back and kissed my face and loved me which was exactly the treatment I needed. He's so good about doing that.

Kevin is such a hard worker. Seriously. He makes me feel like the laziest bum of them all while he works his behind off in all of his classes and his job. And then when I apologize for being such a loser he is quick to make me feel worthwhile. He never does or says anything to make me feel like he's better than me (even though he really is).  Yesterday Kevin took a 3 hour math midterm and got a great score. Then he gave a presentation on a group project that he has been working SO HARD on for weeks. Seriously, our days consist of this: We wake up at 5:30, meet at my car at 6:30 and I drive Kevin to school then go to work. Kevin works all morning on his homework and/or his job, goes to his classes, does more homework, and then more homework, then when I get out of class at 5:15 we both go home and have dinner and then he does MORE homework until 9:00 when he takes me home and then he usually stays up even later doing more work. I am so grateful for how hard my Kevin works. He is doing it so that he can provide for me and our family and I appreciate it so much.

Kevin is the sweetest, cutest, most cheesy boy I have ever met. He LOVES making those sweet comments that some people might gag on but that I just melt for. He tells me loves me at least 6 times a day, usually much more, he brings me chocolate ALL THE TIME. Seriously he just whips it out of nowhere. He is also constantly telling me that I am beautiful, even when I just got out of the gym and I'm a sweaty mess. He is constantly making this sweet gestures that just get me every time.

Kevin would do anything for me. I'm serious. If I ever asked him for anything, the answer would be yes (unless it was inappropriate or dangerous or something). And he does. He rearranges his schedule when I beg him to please please please come to women's health class because I desperately want him to be there with me when we are talking about fertility. He was planning on going to the doctor with me and wait in the waiting room so that he could drive me home, and would gladly miss his classes. And he would have if he hadn't had those darn midterms. Whenever I approach him with any idea, he listens to every detail, asks a few questions, and if he can see that it is important to me, the answer is always yes.

Kevin loves to cook and he is the cleanest boy I've ever met. We have had many a date at home, making homemade pizza or a nice dinner. I love it. He teaches me all sorts of things and doesn't mind that my best dish is spaghetti and that we eat hamburger helper once a week.

Kevin loves family. He adores his family and I know he misses them, being so far away. He has slid right into the dynamics of my family and he truly loves spending time with them. It makes him so happy to go to grandma's house for dinner or dessert and he will eat thirds and fourths because he knows that it makes my grandma happy. He teases my sisters and talks to my brother about his interests. Family is so important to him and we both very much want to make family a priority in our lives.

Kevin loves me and he shows me how much he loves me. He treats me like the daughter of God that I am. He has never ever raised his voice to me, except to yell across the parking lot "I LOVE AMBERLY HURST!" He has so much respect for me and he would do anything to avoid making me unhappy or disrespecting me in any way.

Kevin puts up with my crazy, hormonal, emotional moments. He chuckles at me when I ask him to bring me anything and everything to eat. He happily brings me 5 otter pops and makes sure that I don't get the purple or red ones. When I start bawling because I'm on my period and watching a movie about a woman who gets stuck in Iran he doesn't make me feel like an idiot for becoming paranoid but calmly promises that he won't turn into a crazy Iranian after we get married and he won't make us move to the middle east. He understands why I am upset when I'm that way and he's learning really fast what to do when, and what NOT to when. He works so hard to keep me happy and content and he does a really wonderful job.

I have a million and a half more reasons why I am so crazy in love with Kevin. But unfortunately, I really need to go to class. I can't really justify missing more school, and plus, Kevin is taking time out of his busy day to come to class with me. I have so missed his handsome face and I can't wait to feel his arms around me.

I love Kevin Stevens. I want the whole world to know it and to vomit in their mouth at how over the top cheesy and adorable we are. I am so that girl, and we are so that couple. And I plan to continue to be for the rest of forever, the end.

in case you were wondering.

I love my fiance Kevin.

And I have a whole host of reasons why which I will be happy to tell you.

Just not right now because it's time for me to go to work.

But before I go to work, I get to take Kevin to school.

Those 15 minutes we get to spend together every morning are the highlight of my day.

I just love him.

we are survivors

This week has been hard. Midterms. Homework. Busy. Announcements. Work.
We are surviving over here.
I'm trying to collect addresses so we can start sending out announcements right when they get here.
So if you want an invitation and you haven't done it already, go to our facebook event called "Kevin and Amberly's Wedding" and click on the link for the google.doc right at the top of the event. Then you can easily fill out the document with your name and address and it will be completely private for you. Kevin and I will be the only ones who can see it.

Wish me luck on my marriage prep midterm tomorrow.
I'm off to bed.

I'm procrastinating by blogging

Happy Saturday!
Happy Homecoming week BYU!
Happy football game day!

Today is Saturday which is very happy. So far today I have wasted much time stalking blogs and facebook. I took a shower and shaved my legs. I've started and completed a "plan your school time til graduation" assignment and taken a Stats quiz. I also had breakfast with my love, and kissed him a lot.

We are going to the football game today.
And to a movie tonight.
Hooray for having things to do!

I really need to start on my assignment that makes me analyze dating websites. I don't want to.
So....

Kevin drinks this stuff called mate. He picked it up on his mission to Costa Rica. I think that it tastes kind of like how manure smells, also like hay. It makes his breath smell funny. I kiss him anyway.

Last night Kevin and I went out with our good friends Kristen and John. We hung out at their place and had yummy homemade pizza and drinks and big fat chocolate eclairs (that Kevin was so nice and let me buy for dessert even though they weren't his favorite thing in the world). We played with their adorable little boys who I just love and exclaimed at how smart Tim has gotten and how chubby Michael is. We helped them put their boys to bed and then watched Just Friends which was really funny and we had a lot of laughs. We sat and talked for a while longer and had a grand old time. We really like them. Guys, let's make sure that the next time we hang out is sooner than the last time we did.

Also, forgiveness. It's more than just saying sorry.

Kevin sometimes tries to teach me about what he is learning in Organic Chemistry. He's funny. I love him.

Also, today when I said "I really want chocolate" right after we had finished an enormous breakfast, Kevin said, "I have a snickers bar!" and I said, "How do you keep pulling chocolate out of no where? Where is it all coming from?" And Kevin said, "I save it. I want to always be able to have chocolate when you say that you want some."
Isn't he the sweetest? I love him.

I'm about to eat a blue otter pop.
I'm happy about that.

Oh! Yesterday afternoon my best fran Ashley came over and we watched I Didn't Know I was Pregnant for like 2 hours. It was crazy awesome. Then my sister Cammie came over and hung out for a little while. I love her. I miss her when she's at school.

You know who else I love? Kevin. I love Kevin.

I don't know if I've ever created a blog post as random as this one. I know it has a lot of words, and people like Cammie probably have stopped reading it by now. But I just really don't even care to do homework. I don't want to do it.

Maybe I'll watch more I Didn't Know I was Pregnant.

are we there yet?

In two months and twelve days, Kevin and I are getting married.
There is so much to do still, but we have gotten so much accomplished in the past week.
Invitations have been designed and ordered. Heck yes.
We have created a googledoc and posted it on Facebook so that people can give us their addresses.
My fiance is a flipping genius and made it so that it is set up as a survey, and we are the only ones who have access to their information.
Score to us. I absolutely hate putting my address out for strangers to see.
The doctor has been visited and the awkward pre-marital exam has been completed.
Speaking of that, I had myself all sorts of freaked out.
Like, by the time I made it to the doctors office today (over an hour early), I was shaking and sweating and Freaking. Out.
I went to our family physician so it was the lady who I have seen my whole life.
Like, she gave me my kindergarten shots.
And then today she gave me a pap smear.
She thought that was very weird.
But then the whole thing took like 7 minutes total and wasn't even that awkward at all.

So having those very big things out of the way, I feel like we could get married tomorrow and be absolutely fine (which means that we would not have a reception because we have done almost nothing for that, but at this point, I feel like I would kind of be okay with that).

Bring it on December 22, bring it on.

And here, I'll post another engagement picture that you haven't seen. :)

This is when we were dancing in the middle of the road and Kevin was singing to me. I love him. :)

thank you president monson

Today was the kind of day
Where I didn't go to the gym.
I put my hair in a bun on top of my head.
We got Wendy's on the way home from the grocery store.
So I wouldn't have to make dinner.
At least we went to the store.
I did the bare minimum to get by on my homework.
We just stayed for the spiritual part of FHE.
And then left.
And now I'm distracting myself by blogging.
And I'm going home in 15 minutes.
And I have to do my cleaning check still.
But I'll probably procrastinate it til tomorrow.

we live for the weekends!

We have had a fantastic Conference weekend, full of awesome food, spiritual enlightenment and lots of naps. Enjoy the iphone pics!

 Romantic dinner date on Friday.

 We went to the cold BYU game against Utah State. I started falling asleep so we left. On our way out we saw this confusing garbage can. Who needs to take a chain saw to a BYU game?

 Kevin really really needed a haircut. So we finally broke out the clippers that Kevin bought a few months ago and I tried my hand at cutting boy hair. It was slightly terrifying.

 

 My handsome fiance.    And a huge pile of hair afterward

During Priesthood session, I got to go out with my darling Ashley who got married about a month an a half ago. We went out to Zupas and watched Bones. So fun. I love this girl and her friendship has been such a blessing in my life. Love you Ash Bash!

We have eaten so well this weekend. We decided to go all out for conference weekend. Saturday we had a feast of bacon, eggs, grits and toast (unfortunately we didn't take pictures. What were we thinking?). This morning we finished off the bacon and had homemade waffles with fruit, syrup and whipped cream.

What a spread.

We had a lovely conference afternoon today at Grandma's house, with a delicious lunch of pork roast, potatoes, tons of veggies and a Swedish dessert called brown betty. We love spending time at Grandma's house. We leave stuffed full of good food. :)

We are so grateful that we got to have the chance to rest and recuperate this weekend, to prepare for another busy week of school and work. The messages of Conference were so sweet, and the announcement about lowering the missionary age has had an affect on so many people that I love. Hooray for wonderful weekends!

sneak peak: real edition

Okay, okay. I desperately want to share another picture. We are still deciding which pictures we are going to put on our announcements and don't want to spoil the surprise for anyone when they open their invitation. So it looks like this one isn't going on the invitation. ;) 

Enjoy the lovely Janna's wonderful skill with the camera and my skill with photoshop.

Happy General Conference today and tomorrow! I love Conference almost as much as I love Kevin. They are both so good to me.